Here lately especially at school I just have not been in it for some reasons I do not know why. I like school its just that it is seeming to become almost too much even though it is not enough. I kind of have this I do not care attitude or sort of like I am not into it for some reason. I am needing some motivation and stuff like that I guess, I do like school I am just finding it harder to actually stay focused or even know what is going on. Today was our midterms and I did well on those I just left psychology class early today I was not feeling it. Maybe this is just a rough patch because I worked so hard to get into school. I just do not want it to be a waste of time. I think some of these feelings are because of some personal issues I need to deal with. I am really tired for no reason I went to bed at 2am and got up at 9am that is seven hours of sleep I am just so drained it feels like. I have had some pretty bad anxiety lately also I do not really know why though.

I woke up with a sore throat and a really bad cough congested I guess. I was not feeling well then I ate some food and have been drinking teas to help me get better. I ate a whole pack of lozenges with in two hours it is that bad. To top it off I am not the only one I coughed so hard in the car I thought I was going to have to go to the hospital. It is not so great. I just have to relax though. I can tell that the tea is working a little bit or atleast I hope so..I hope this goes away soon. I am supposed to start this diet soon I do not know when though I also am going to not be drinking cokes (ha) But really I am going to try this and start to get healthy again so I can go back to the Army and become and Officer. And we are supposed to start working out but…I also am unaware of when this will take place. I ran 2 miles the other day and my legs felt like they were breaking almost. As I write this the dogs legs are twitching I think he is having a dream. 

Well I had a dream the other night, and in this dream I had Hot Pink hair and it was long and flowing then we braided it; the hot pink represents sex and lust while the hairpiece in my dream represents I am loosing my mind or some sort of deception. Then the next dream was about me having the hair as my own; the hair in that dream signifiessexual virility, seduction, sensuality, vanity, and health.�It is indicative of your attitudes. If your hair is knotted or tangled, then it is symbolic of uncertainty and confusion in your life. You may be unable to think straight. If you dream that you make a drastic change to your hairstyle, then it means that you are making a drastic, new approach to some issue in your waking life. If the wind is blowing through your hair, then it signifies freedom to express uninhibited feelings. You are “letting your hair down”. 

So yeah what is up with that?

Now that college has started, I have been wondering when will it hit me. Well today I was in my psychology class and it did, I was like this is a lot to learn in two hours and a lot of studying to do. We were analyzing things and it was a group project, which so far is what my other teachers have had us doing. I do not understand yet why I am not in a university, so far this has been kinda easy, I know it will get more difficult but a lot of my so called peers are only here for one thing and that is to get a better job, I am here to learn and learn something new. I asked a person today why he was here and this was his reply he is in two of my classes and he is totally a stoner, he asked me if I “smoked out” and I was like nah not really. The thing is you have to pay to go to college why in the world  are you here to get a better job, yes that is one of the perks of going to college but really and this school is not even a real college 3/4 of the people I have seen here so far would not get very far at a university. There is one kid in my psychology class and he belongs in the “nerd herd” at KSU why is he going here he is way to smart. I don’t know if I am complaining or just asking, but I know why I go here and that is to get a better knowledge of things and go to a university so I can have a degree and learn a lot more. Then I can have a nicer job because with out knowledge you can not even get a job at McDonald’s. Now that I have said all of that I would like to say that so far I am enjoying school not the people really but the enjoyment of learning.

I was in the jeep studying, and I seen someone who I did not really like or something like that so I drove around for a few minutes, then I started flying the jeep and then some how landed back on a road. I then was walking up the road towards two people who I did not recognize they were standing in front of a tunnel on the road throwing beer bottles, right before I got to them I yelled out get it boy as he threw some of these off this road. I then proceeded to walk by them and as I get into the tunnel one of them hits someone I was with, with a bottle in the leg, then the other guy threw one at me. I then turned and threw one at the guy who threw one at me and then the other guy as well, the other guy moved and said ha ha you missed me, so I pulled out a gun and shot him, it was not a kill shot 

Homework 
To dream that you are doing homework symbolizes the lessons that have learned or are learning. Pay attention to the assignment in your dream and figure out how it can be applied to your waking life.

Flying 
To dream that you are flying signifies a sense of freedom where you had initially felt restricted and limited.

Walking 
To dream that you are walking with ease signifies a slow, but steady progress toward your goals. You are moving through life in a confident manner. Consider your destination.

Throw

To dream that someone is throwing something at you implies that there is something that you have overlooked and need to pay closer attention. Perhaps you need to be on the alert for something that is headed your way. Consider how hard the throw is and what is being thrown at your for additional significance.�If it was a hard throw, then it means that you may be in for a surprise.

Bottle 
To see a bottle in your dream indicates that you are pushing your feelings back inside, rather than expressing them. The contents of the bottle represent the nature of the emotions. A bottle of champagne shows your need to socialize, while a bottle of poison signifies evil thoughts and a wine bottle symbolize sexuality.

To see an empty bottle denotes that you have exhausted your inner resources. You may be feeling drained and empty inside.

Road 

To see an unknown road in your dream represents a path that has not been ventured. You are setting a new precedence for something.To dream that a threatening creature is on a road parallels a hostile situation/person you are encountering in your waking life. It is an obstacle that you need to overcome, no matter how intimidating the situation or person may appear.

Tunnel 
To see a tunnel in your dream represents the vagina, womb, and birth. Thus it may refer to a need for security and nurturance.

To dream that you are going through a tunnel suggests that you are exploring aspects of your subconscious. You are opening yourself to a brand new awareness. Alternatively, it indicates your limited perspective as in the phrase “tunnel vision”. Are you being close minded or narrow minded in some issue?

To see the light at the end of a tunnel symbolizes hope. You will navigate through life and all its difficulties with great success. Alternatively, it also indicates the end of your journey and the realization of your goals.

Shooting

 If the person you shoot is a stranger, then it indicates that you are rejecting unknown aspects of yourself that you do not understand.

I was at somewhere and I was in a band, but my cousin was here and he was helping us build a helicopter and he took a needle that was on fire and put it in my ear and it made my ear have like a two inch gauge, he spary painted the helicopter with his mouth. We then got in it to go to a concert after or before lynyrd skynyrd, so that is when we headed out but on the way to the lake we wrecked and slid for a while, on the road then trough the trees as soon as the heliocopter hit the water we all jumped out then I was still in untill it hit the water, then I jumped out as soon as it hit the water it fell to pieces,they were on the other side of this creek that was about as wide as a road as I was on the other side as the water came up from the wreckage, I was still in it a bit. We all made sure each other was ok then my dad pulled up as he did I asked him for a cigarette, he said why I said do you see all that stuff I am still shook up. 

Helicopter 
To see a helicopter in your dream represents your ambitions and achievements. You are in full pursuit of your goals.

To dream that you are in a helicopter indicates that you are living beyond your means. You need to slow down and not try to please everyone. Alternatively, you may be experiencing a higher level of consciousness, new-found freedom and greater awareness.

Band 
To see a band or play with a band in your dream represents a sense of community and belonging. The dream may also be a pun on banding together and need for cooperation/unity.

Family 
To see your own family in your dream represents security, warmth and love. It could also symbolize bitterness, jealousy, or rivalry, depending on your relationship with your family. Alternatively, it could mean that you are overly dependent on your family, especially if the family members are in your recurring dreams. Consider also the significance of a particular family member or the relationship you have with them.�If you dream that your family does not act or appear as they normally are, then it means that you want to distance yourself from them. Or you simply don’t understand where they are coming from.

Ears 

To see ears in your dreams suggest that you need to be more responsive or receptive to guidance and assistance from others. You may be relying too much on your own judgment and intuition. You need to listen more closely to what you are being told. Alternatively, it signifies your immaturity and lack of experience. If you dream that your ears are weird or oddly shaped, then it indicates deception. If your ears are getting red, then it symbolizes shame or guilt.To dream that you are stretching your earlobes indicates your desires to be more connected with your ancestors and understanding of where you came from. Alternatively, it means that you want to stand out and be different. You want to go against the norm.To dream that you are being burned by fire indicates that your temper is getting out of control. Some issue or situation is burning you up inside.

Concert 

To dream that you are holding a concert symbolizes your untapped talents and hidden potential. You need to show of your creative side.

Paint 
To see paint in your dream symbolizes expression of your inner emotions. Consider the color of the paint and how the color makes your feel. It is this feeling that you need to express more in your waking life

Wreck 

To see a wreck in your dream represents obstacles and barriers toward your goals. You feel that you are being held back or that you are not making any progress.

To dream that you are sliding represents a loss of control.

Road 
To see a road in your dream refers to your sense of direction and how you are pursuing your goals. If the road is winding, curvy, or bumpy in your dream, then it suggests that you will encounter many obstacles and setbacks toward achieving your goals. You may be met with unexpected difficulties. If the road is dark, then it reflects the controversial or more frightening choices which you have made or are making.�

If the road is smooth and bordered by trees or flowers, then it denotes a steady progress and steady climb up the social ladder. If the road is straight and narrow, then it means that your path to success is going as planned.

To see an unknown road in your dream represents a path that has not been ventured. You are setting a new precedence for something.

Trees 
To see lush green trees in your dream symbolize new hopes, growth, desires, knowledge, and life. It also implies strength, protection and stability. You are concentrating on your own self-development and individuation. To see bare trees in your dream indicate used up energy. You have put your all into some relationship or project and now you are exhausted. Perhaps you are even feeling depressed. Alternatively, the dream signifies the cycle of life or the passage of time.

Lake 
To see a lake in your dream signifies your emotional state of mind. You feel restricted and that you can’t express your emotions freely. Alternatively, the lake may provide you with solace, security, and peace of mind. If the lake is clear and calm, then it symbolizes your inner peace. If the lake is disturbed, then you may be going through some emotional turmoil.

Cigarettes 
To dream that you are smoking or offering a cigarette signifies your need for a break. It may also points to issues of�dependency .

Last night I had a few dreams and there was a lot of cheating deciet, secrecy and some sketchy situations. I know that I looked up some of these things , it said things like not being innovative or structured and stuck pretty much. I am not so sure any of this had to do with it or if some of it was more about things I seen in reality because some of these things I have seen and the same two girls I have been dreaming about were in it too. I have no idea why though but I do know that there was aliens, pranks,mudding and some sexy situations going on but not with those two girls. so look up these on dream moods and find out what some of this means, some of it was good like I saw a mail box and it said that I am about to receive  important information that you are about to receive so maybe 

I can get a job or something, I know that it also said that I take things too lightly for the pranks but it made me sad, but here is my dream 

I was in college(stress) we were in band and we were playing pranks on teachers and other people we had a undercover cop in there with us and she was an alien, she blinged out things before we found out, there was a brown frog and just really fuzzy from there except the sexy flirting that was going on 

If you have noticed I have not really been on any sites lately it is because from Thursday night to Sunday night I was drinking, a lot, a lot lot, and yesterday I had a wretched hangover and thought I was not going to be able to go to sleep, finally I passed out around 3-4am last night and woke up today with a bit of a stomach ache but, better than all that anxiety I had yesterday and puking ugh. The puke does not bother me as much as the anxiety parts do because I mentally break down and stay like really dizzy all day, I do not like this so I do believe that I will not be going on any 3-5 day drinking binges for a while, this was because I wanted to drink Thursday, I only had a few Friday was day before Cinco De Mayo and I wanted to celebrate that well, on Saturday I got totally wasted and missed a few things, I was starting to sober on Sunday did not go to sleep till 7:50am and woke up around 11am I then stayed up till 2-3am last night and well, like I said I have a slight stomach ache and may need to hit the bathroom, but it is a lot better than having super dizzy spells and constant panic…so that was pretty much how my weekend went I pissed some people off and the others Idk but I do know that I do not even want a drink, I think thinking about it has made my stomach hurt worse…

So I was checking out my old phone today and I was like where is the menu button…:/ I was very sad in my discovery to remember that iphones do not have menus the phone screen is the menu, when I remembered this I was like uggghhh I could not believe that I had forgotten how to use it. It made me sad, so I need to get it back, also not in white I have had two iphone 4s and they both were white so now I have decided to only get a black one. They also had an otter box that was pink camouflage and also digital camo grey color and pink. I should be getting the pink camouflage one, when I do decide to get a phone.  

I need a vehicle I am not sure of what to get either a Crotch rocket, truck, or car. I know that a car/truck would be best because of the weather situations and things like this, but a motorcycle is more affordable on gas and its just cheaper in general. I do want/need at this point a vehicle. I do think that I am going to try and save up enough money to get a Camaro though ever since my dream I have seen a lot of them and I really do like this vehicle either that a charger or a TOyota Prius I know but you know its a nifty looking car. My truck would be a 1500 or f150 on 35’s with a small lift kit, but that would be a lot of gas moneys. 

I applied for Academy Outdoors and I really hope I get this job so I can begin to get some of this stuff, or atleast save up for some of it. I want this job so I can get a element 21 Carrot stick fishing rod, and a shimano calais fishing reel. The rod is $200, and the reel is $300-$400, who spends that much on fishing stuff, I know but I do and its for a reason too I am a hardcore down to the bone Bass and stri-per not stripper lol fisherman. I some day want to be on the BASS tournament trail but, you have to have a new boat and gear like I am talking about, I could get some/ most of this stuff for half price or atleast a discount, so I can presue my dreams I gotta run for now :)

I had a dream where I was fishing under a bridge and I seen some of my friends and they were in dresses these friends were all girls, but two really stuck out to me. Also they were over/in the water and waves were coming through.

Fishing 
To dream that you are fishing indicates that you are confronting and bringing your repressed emotions to the surface. In particular, to dream that you are ice fishing suggests that you are breaking through a hardened emotional barrier and confronting difficult feelings from your subconscious. Alternatively, it represents your need for leisure and relaxation.

Consider the common phrase “fishing for compliments”. Perhaps you are looking for attention.

Waves 
To see clear, calm waves in your dream signify renewal and clarity. You are reflecting on some important life decision that needs to be made. Alternatively, if you are riding a wave, then it indicates that you are trying to get a handle on your emotions. Waves also symbolize potential and power.

Girls 
To see a girl in your dream represents your playful, innocent, and childlike nature. Perhaps you are behaving immaturely in some situation. Alternatively, a girl represents the feminine qualities of your character.

Water 
To see water in your dream symbolizes your subconscious and your emotional state of mind. Water is the living essence of the psyche and the flow of life energy. It is also symbolic of spirituality, knowledge, healing and refreshment.To hear running water in your dream denotes meditation and reflection. You are reflecting on your thoughts and emotions.

Friend 
To see friends in your dream signify aspects of your personality that you have rejected, but are ready to incorporate and acknowledge. The relationships you have with those around you are important in learning about yourself. Alternatively, dreaming of a friend indicates positive news.

Bridges represent a transitional period in your life where you will be moving on to a new stage. If the bridge is over water, then it suggests that your transition will be an emotional one. If you fall off the bridge and into the water, then the dream indicates that you are letting your emotions hold you back and prevent you from moving forward

Dress 
To see or wear a dress in your dream represents a feminine outlook or feminine perspective on a situation. You are freely expressing your femininity.